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Living the Absurd: How It Shapes My Life

An absurd experience in my life was being diagnosed with bipolar disorder. At first, I thought I was simply dealing with anxiety and insomnia, but the diagnosis came out of nowhere, completely unexpected. It felt random, almost surreal, and itโs had a profound impact on my life ever since.
In absurdist philosophy, something is absurd when it lacks inherent meaning. The world itself, in its chaos and randomness, isnโt rational and doesnโt provide any transcendent purpose. Yet, as human beings, weโre driven to seek that meaning, to impose some kind of order on our lives. In facing the absurd, we have a few possible responses: suicide, religious belief, seeking power (as portrayed in Albert Camusโ play Caligula), or accepting the absurd without trying to resolve it.
For me, I would choose religious belief, because it offers meaning to things we feel should have meaning. Even without hard proof, religion provides answers and a sense of order that comforts us in a world that otherwise might seem purposeless. It’s the closest solution to satisfying our deep need for meaning.
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Warped and Twisted
Warped and Twisted is a raw and haunting poem that dives into hidden battles, silent screams, and the fractured mind. Paired with Dave Whiteโs intense illustration FACEFEAR, it captures the chaos of inner turmoil, the weight of secrets, and the resilience of surviving pain while twisted by fear.
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Condemned to Choose
Freedom is intoxicating and terrifying. Sartre claimed we are โcondemned to be free,โ bound to bear the weight of every choice. Yet nature and faith remind us that freedom is not limitless. This essay explores the paradox of human choiceโthe beauty and the burden echoing through every soul.
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I Am Your Disease
I am your disease โ a voice that devours hope, strips honor, and waits in shadow. It promises ruin, claims your pleasures, and whispers you back into darkness. For every step toward healing, it watches, patient and furious, ready to reclaim you. This is the confession of that relentless enemy now.
